Dear Clients & Colleagues

“Play is the foundation of creative intelligence, but like any intelligence it must be developed, in keeping with nature’s model imperative. The child who is played with will learn to play. The child who is not played with will be unable to play and be at risk on every level.” Joseph Chilton Pearce, Evolution’s End (1993)

Since my last newsletter I have become the mother of a teenager! My son Ryan turned 13 this month and now towers well over an inch above me and has a size 11 shoe (yes, his dad is 6ft5” tall!). My wired son now sms’s the landline to tell me when he is in bed and ready to be tucked in. I got the giggles the other night when this American voicemail voice came down the line saying: “Are you coming any time soon?” Cheeky boy!

We are loving watching all Ryan’s friends turn into teens and what a great group of kids they are. We organised a Mad Food Party for 17 thirteen year olds the other day and they had a ball trying to decode their menus and ordering the strangest of concoctions. For first course one child ordered a knife, fork, spoon, salt and pepper (Neptune’s Trident, Mugger’s Delight, Medium Shovel, Savoury Rock and Hot Sneeze)! Many received ice cream with mayonnaise on the side and a sosatie for mains (Eskimo Milk, Tangy Dipper and Pierced Hen) with no utensils at all, and still others found themselves eating salad with chocolate sauce and yellow rice for dessert (Bunny’s Brunch, Solid Cocoa and Lello Lice), with a toothpick. In between we played some hilarious games and then the boys kept asking for more. It just goes to show that big kids stilll wanna play and have fun! Just because they are growing up and are part of the wired generation doesn’t mean they have outgrown the need or desire to play. And this is why I have developed the Big Kid Fun© Workshop for parents of children from eight years to teens (yes, I will teach you the hilarious games we played at the party too!).

I was relieved of all mothering duties last weekend as my husband took our boys off to the Desert Rally in Botswana with a couple of mates and their sons. They camped out in the middle of nowhere, not showering on cleaning their teeth for two days and nights. They watched the cars, bikes and quads come racing by, got absolutely filthy from playing one, two, three block in the bush and returned with a patchwork quilt of thorn scratches on their legs. The dads say it is amazing how the boys never whinge and are so brave when mum isn’t around! It was really good ‘boy fun’ for Father’s Day, that has become an annual tradition for these lads and dads, proving the point that there’s nothing as rewarding as making fun out of nothing. When there are no toys, nature provides all the inspiration for wholesome fun. Space and nature is something children, and boys in particular, yearn for. It is a rare commodity in our world of high density living and the limitations placed on our children’s freedom to explore the outdoors due to security issues.

What family traditions are you creating that your children will be able to reminisce about around a campfire one day? Are you making the time to get your children ‘out’ and away from the lure of the multimedia home entertainment centre that has become more than just the babysitter but a perceived bodyguard? And if you can’t get out, get playing. Here is something you can start with………………………..

BIG KID FUN© WORKSHOPS

Big Kid Fun© is for all those parents (and grandparents) who have been asking “What next? What do we do with our children over the age of seven?” Big Kid Fun© is a workshop designed for families with 8 – 99 year olds who love to have fun. It is a very interactive workshop that will consist of a small amount of theory – the importance of play and staying connected with your children – and a lot of Big Kid Fun©. Yes, you will play a lot including some hilarious games you have never heard of! You will be reminded of all the fun to be had with a simple deck of cards, then you will tantalise your tastebuds with some heavenly winter desserts, tea and coffee, afterwhich I will take you through my top family games (classics and those that are hot right now). Big kids of all ages still wanna play and have fun. Join us for an entertaining and inspiring 3 hour workshop.

DATE & TIME (choose one date): Wednesday, 16 July, 7 – 10pm, Thursday, 17 July, 9am – 12pm Wednesday, 23 July, 7 – 10pm Wednesday, 30 July, 7 – 10pm Thursday, 31 July, 7 – 10pm

VENUE : 6 Lombardi Lane, Douglasdale

COST : R300.00 per person including workshop, notes, refreshments and lucky draws)

BOOKINGS : brightideas@powerpt.co.za

PARENTING ON THE RUN© WORKSHOP

Come and learn how to cheat time in this interactive 2 ½ hour workshop. Leave armed with over 100 creative and practical ideas for converting what you would normally consider wasted time with your children, into quality time. I will show you how to maximize time spent in the car; doing everyday household activities, or even waiting for appointments with your child.

I will also include my ever-popular suggestions on toys to pack for travelling, or for when you are simply on the run. Your child need never be bored and you can always connect no matter where you are or what you are doing. Connecting and communicating your child can be so easy. Join the quest to become a more creative and effective parent. Suitable for parents with children from 2 – 8 (although all ideas are relevant right up to teens!).

DATE & TIME: Tuesday, 22 July 2008, 9 – 11.30am

VENUE : 6 Lombardi Lane, Douglasdale

COST : R250.00 per person including notes, refreshments and lucky draws

BOOKINGS : brightideas@powerpt.co.za

Keep on playing and connecting with your precious children!

NIKKI BUSH

The Bright Ideas Outfit

It seems that campaigns by lobbying groups against indiscriminate marketing to children are starting to pay off with well-known corporations agreeing to change food formulations and marketing tactics to avoid facing law suits. Kellogg’s hit the headlines just this week, click here for details http://www.commercialfreechildhood.org/settlement.htm. The Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood (CCFC) is now targeting the gaming industry regarding violence and children with the imminent release of Manhunt 2 (which has already been banned in the UK). Another coup late last year was the CFCC’s stand against the launch of the Pussycat Dolls by Hasbro http://www.commercialfreechildhood.org/news/risquedolllimit.htm.

This is all positive and interesting stuff, however, as I say to parents in my Connecting with Children through the Noise & Clutter presentation, while these organisations are doing a great job on our behalf, it is only half of the battle won. We, as parents, have to take responsibility for what goes on in our own homes and backyards too. Here are some thoughts to ponder:

- Are we taking advantage of teachable moments to educate our children (billboard advertisements, inappropriate TV viewing etc)?
- Are we helping our children to select appropriate on-screen content?
- Are we limiting our children’s exposure to on-screen media and balancing it with real play experiences?
- Are we educating ourselves about the various media and communication channels our children are accessing or being accessed by (www.digitalads.org )
- Are we educating our children about marketing tactics? What is the marketer or advertiser is really selling and how are they doing it?
- Do these marketing messages fit in with our family values?
- Are we giving our children clear guidelines as to the unwritten ground rules that apply in our own homes (how we do things around here)?
- Are we spending enough time face-to-face with our children?
- Are we outsourcing child care or are we outsourcing actual parenting today?
- How well do we know our child? Do we know which buttons to press to engage him or her?

As a parent you are your child’s primary educator and principle purveyor of values. You are the role model and your child copies you. Are you walking your talk? Remember that we are living in the Age of the Image – children are taking their cues more from what they see than what they hear. This has huge ramifications for families for it is no longer a ‘do as I say world’, but a ‘do as I do world’. Our children are watching us. So are advertisers and marketers, who are competing for our leading role.

The world is as it is. The media and technology are not going to go away. It is a fact that we can no longer totally protect our children in a plug and play world. Today the world comes to you, with or without your permission. It interacts with your child too, much of the time with or without your permission (billboards and cellphones are good examples, for more see www.digitalads.org ). This also means that the world today is full of teachable moments. Are you going to avoid them or use them to educate and protect your child? Without a doubt, young children need to learn to discern from an extremely early age. The process of teaching your child to be discerning and media savvy is one of the ways in which you can help to keep them safe. This process starts with you, the parent – your preparedness to really engage with your child; the relationship you consciously set out to build with your child; the knowledge you acquire, and the skill with which you apply that knowledge to your parenting journey.

If there ever was a need to parent consciously, the time is NOW!

Nikki Bush was quoted extensively in an article entitled Born to be Wired (Born 2 B Y-D) in the Sunday Life Technology section. Journalist Edwin Naidu.

Dear Parents and Colleagues

WE MUST PLAY OUR PART TOO

It seems that campaigns by lobbying groups against indiscriminate marketing to children are starting to pay off with well-known corporations agreeing to change food formulations and marketing tactics to avoid facing law suits. Kellogg’s hit the headlines just this week, click here for details http://www.commercialfreechildhood.org/settlement.htm. The Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood (CCFC) is now targeting the gaming industry regarding violence and children with the imminent release of Manhunt 2 (which has already been banned in the UK). Another coup late last year was the CFCC’s stand against the launch of the Pussycat Dolls by Hasbro http://www.commercialfreechildhood.org/news/risquedolllimit.htm.

This is all positive and interesting stuff, however, as I say to parents in my Connecting with Children through the Noise & Clutter presentation, while these organisations are doing a great job on our behalf, it is only half of the battle won. We, as parents, have to take responsibility for what goes on in our own homes and backyards too. Here are some thoughts to ponder:

-Are we taking advantage of teachable moments to educate our children (billboard advertisements, inappropriate TV viewing etc)?
-Are we helping our children to select appropriate on-screen content?
-Are we limiting our children’s exposure to on-screen media and balancing it with real play experiences?
-Are we educating ourselves about the various media and communication channels our children are accessing or being accessed by (www.digitalads.org )
-Are we educating our children about marketing tactics? What is the marketer or advertiser is really selling and how are they doing it?
-Do these marketing messages fit in with our family values?
-Are we giving our children clear guidelines as to the unwritten ground rules that apply in our own homes (how we do things around here)?
-Are we spending enough time face-to-face with our children?
-Are we outsourcing child care or are we outsourcing actual parenting today?
-How well do we know our child? Do we know which buttons to press to engage him or her?

As a parent you are your child’s primary educator and principle purveyor of values. You are the role model and your child copies you. Are you walking your talk? Remember that we are living in the Age of the Image – children are taking their cues more from what they see than what they hear. This has huge ramifications for families for it is no longer a ‘do as I say world’, but a ‘do as I do world’. Our children are watching us. So are advertisers and marketers, who are competing for our leading role.

The world is as it is. The media and technology are not going to go away. It is a fact that we can no longer totally protect our children in a plug and play world. Today the world comes to you, with or without your permission. It interacts with your child too, much of the time with or without your permission (billboards and cellphones are good examples, for more see www.digitalads.org ). This also means that the world today is full of teachable moments. Are you going to avoid them or use them to educate and protect your child? Without a doubt, young children need to learn to discern from an extremely early age. The process of teaching your child to be discerning and media savvy is one of the ways in which you can help to keep them safe. This process starts with you, the parent – your preparedness to really engage with your child; the relationship you consciously set out to build with your child; the knowledge you acquire, and the skill with which you apply that knowledge to your parenting journey.

If there ever was a need to parent consciously, the time is NOW!

Learn how to cheat time – come to Parenting on the Run

Come and learn how to cheat time in this fun and interactive workshop. Leave armed with over 100 creative and practical ideas for converting what you would normally consider wasted time with your children, into quality time.

Let me show you how to maximize time spent in the car; doing everyday household activities, or even waiting for appointments with your child. You can stimulate your child’s brain and connect emotionally even when you are on the run. I will also include my ever popular suggestions on toys to pack for travelling, or for when you are simply on the run. Connecting and communicating with your child can be so easy and mutually rewarding. For parents of 3 – 7 year olds.

DATE : Friday, 29 June 2007 from 9 – 11.30am OR

Saturday, 30 June 2007 from 9.30 – 12.00

VENUE : 6 Lombardi Lane, Douglasdale

COST : R150 per person (includes notes, a set of giant dice, a

R50.00 Toys R Us voucher, tea and eats)

TO BOOK : brightideas@powerpt.co.za

Comments from previous delegates:

“Many thanks for the fantastic Parenting on the Run workshop. Your practical suggestions have worked brilliantly for us. I have two very busy little boys (4 and 2) who are easily bored and distracted, but they are putty in my hands with my newfound “box of tricks”! Thanks for a really worthwhile experience.“ Kathleen Bartels

“I can’t believe that I don’t have to feel guilty about being busy anymore!” Audrey Stanley

“Parenting on the run is simpler than I realised. Anyone can do this.” Craig Aitken

“If parents put into practice just a handful of your ideas they would reinforce what we are teaching at pre-school and we would be referring fewer children for therapy. We need to get this message out to more parents.” Glynnis Courtney, Head of HeronBridge Pre-prep and chairlady of the ISASA preschool committee.

For more information on other talks and workshops, visit www.brightideasoutfit.com . I will be sending out dates for the following workshops soon:

Nuts & Bolts for Grannies
Connect the Tots
Nuts & Bolts for Parents

I will presenting Connecting with Children through the Noise & Clutter at the ACSI Conference (Association of Christian Schools International) and at a number of schools during July.

TOY NEWS

Throw & Blow to be launched in August

Exciting news! Our second mouth co-ordination game called Throw & Blow will be launched by Smile Education as part of their 2007 Christmas range at the end of August. Click here for more details: http://www.brightideasoutfit.com/2007/06/20/throw-blow-to-be-launched-in-august/

Make ‘n Break

If you have attended any of my workshops in the last year you will know how much I rave about this fabulous family game which entails building against the clock with 8 rectangular building blocks. This game is unavailable in South Africa but if you are travelling to the UK, clients of mine have found stock of it at John Lewis stores. It is made by Ravensburger. Suitable for children from 6 years – adult.

Yours in creative parenting

NIKKI BUSH

Dear Parents and Colleagues

I presented Connecting with Children through the Noise and Clutter at a local school last week, and I asked the audience to raise their hands if they had experienced the following feeling recently – “Stop the world I want to get off!” Surprise, surprise, the majority of the audience raised their hands. We are living with a sense that time has speeded up and yet we still have the same 24 hours each day. What has changed, however, is the rate of change and amount of change that we are having to assimilate – on a daily basis. Just one current issue of the New York Times contains more information about changes than an average farmer from the early nineteenth century would experience in a lifetime. There are days when we have to learn new things not just by the day but by the hour in order to keep up, and it exhausts us. It is becoming increasingly clear that this rapid change is not just a phase that we are going through, but rather, it seems to be the new reality. We need to learn how to survive and thrive in a constantly shifting environment, where rules are made, changed and broken on an ongoing basis in this new Game of Possibility with which we are engaged. For more on this click here http://www.brightideasoutfit.com/2007/02/06/newsletter-january-2007/.

Now think about a preschool child who so able to cope with change and continual learning, in fact every day is an adventure of epic proportions. Admittedly they do take an afternoon nap which helps keep them balanced. Wouldn’t we all do well to have a little siesta each day – bring on those power naps! These little explorers are actually carrying round within them a natural blueprint for success in the 21st century. Let’s look at just some of the characteristics with which preschoolers are so naturally imbued:
- Inquisitiveness and curiosity about their world and how it works
- They are natural explorers
- Physical learners (they create understanding and meaning by trying things out for
themselves, by doing)
- Original thinkers and highly creative (anything is possible)
- Love learning (can’t get enough of it)
- Are not afraid of failure (no matter how high the couch is or how far they may tumble)
- Adaptable and resilient (there are many more characteristics!)

As parents, we need to ensure that these characteristics are nurtured and kept alive throughout our children’s education and not just in the preschool years. If you can preserve them then it also means that you are probably practicing and role modelling most of them yourself – you have become future literate – you are a player in the Game of Possibility and your child will become a professional player too.

Alvin Toffler, futurist and author of the classic Future Shock (written in 1970) was deadly accurate when he said:

“The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.”

In her book Seven Times Smarter veteran US educator Laurel Schmidt says:

“Curiosity is the best toy in the store”.

If we can rekindle our sense of curiosity and learn to not only to ask “Why?”, but “Why not?”, then we might not want to stop the world and get off. In an era where anything is possible, we can become the creators of our own reality, and there is nothing more challenging and exciting than that!

For more on this topic watch out for the book Dr Graeme Codrington and I are co-authoring on 21st century parenting. I will keep you posted on the publication date – at this stage not before end 2007, but you can watch this newsletter and my website for snippets.

WORKSHOPS – WINTER SERIES IN MAY 2007

These workshops are filling up fast. A reminder of the dates:

Nuts & Bolts Workshop
Parents of under 5s
Wednesday, 9 May 2007 9.00 – 11.30am R150.00 per person

Connect the Tots Workshop
Parents of children from birth to 6 years
Wednesday,16 May 10:00 – 11.30am R75.00 per person
Thursday, 17 May 7.30 – 9.00pm R75.00 per person

Parenting on the Run Workshop
Parents of children from 4 – 7 years
Saturday, 26 May 2007 9.00 – 11.30 R150.00 per person

Our Toy Season series at the end of 2006 was oversubscribed. Please remember that payment secures your seat, so book soon to avoid disappointment. Refunds will be entertained up until two weeks prior to each talk. Thereafter, payment is non-refundable.

Watch out for the continuation of the Winter Series in June.

REMSPECED

Paula Barnard, occupational therapist, OT lecturer at Wits University and a long-time colleague of mine, sends out a very interesting online newsletter covering remedial and special education issues in South Africa. To take a look log on to: www.remspeced.co.za. There is also a print edition coming out every second month (starting February 2007) available free of charge in waiting rooms of your local OT, NDT physiotherapist, speech therapist, psychologist etc. l will be writing a regular column touching on issues I am passionate about – helping parents connect with their kids. This 20-24 page magazine will be full of interesting articles, tips and insights to help parents cope with their child who requires additional support in learning, developing and behaviour.

GAME/TOY REVIEWS

1. Zingo (ages 4 and up)

This is a junior bingo game with a very nifty dispenser for the sturdy plastic bingo tiles. This is essentially picture bingo with the words printed beneath the pictures for sight reading. The first person to cover his or her board yells out Zingo! Thoroughly enjoyed by children from 4 – 7. It’s a game that stimulates visual discrimination and matching skills and requires concentration and speed to win. Priced at R120.00+, it’s available at both large toy stores and independents. To view the game or to find out where to get it, log on to www.ttdistributors.co.za. Think Tank Distributors also supplies the following well-known games: Rush Hour, Rush Hour Jr, Safari Rush Hour, River Crossing, River Crossing Jr, Subtrax, Tipover, Toot and Otto and Smart Mouth).

2. Blokus (ages 7 to adult)This strategy game carries a golden seal stating that it is the most awarded game of the 21st century. As we are only at the beginning of this century, I guess it doesn’t have much competition yet. I decided to take a look to see what these claims were all about. Well, this is a must have game that will make it onto my ‘Classics’ list of games every child should have! For a preview of Blokus, go to www.blokus.com where you can play against the computer, obtain advice on the game, place orders for lost pieces, meet other players and see your international ranking! Wow!

Seriously, this is a game for the whole family involving chess-type thinking but in a faster game format. The goal is to strategically place as many of your 21 differently shaped Perspex pieces on the board as possible. The only rule is that you may only place a new piece on the board if it touches another piece of the same colour but only at the corners. Pieces of the same colour cannot be in contact along a straight edge. There are no set moves and every game is different. No reading is required to play this game. It is about thinking skills, problem solving and strategy.

This is a game for two to four players. The age guideline on the box is accurate – from age 7 to adult. Both my children aged 7 and 11 thoroughly enjoyed it and we all wanted to play again and again. The Blokus game board and playing pieces are of a very high quality. Blokus is distributed by Pegasus Toys www.pegasustoys.co.za and retails at R275.00+.

Keep on connecting with your kids!

NIKKI BUSH